It has been a while since I posted. I’ve been meaning to, but I’ve sort of developed a routine, to keep myself completely occupied through the day. That also includes sleeping a little earlier than usual. And I do most of my writing at night, which explains my absence.
But I hope to be more regular now. I have a mini vacation planned for the Dussehra weekend, and that’s something I’m excited about! Also, bigg boss starting soon! And yes, I’m still continuing my work on myself. I’m happier than I’ve ever been in my life. I have reconnected with my inner self, and with nature, and the effects are therapeutic. There are the occasional low moments, but what would life be without them? But I must talk more about the importance of connecting with nature. My mind is more at peace because I’ve started taking these long nature walks. It is healing and refreshing. If you too are trying to connect with yourself, I would highly recommend connecting with nature.
Okay, this is completely unrelated to the content above, but hasn’t this year just flown by? I just looked at the date and realized that September is almost over. Time flies. Let’s just make the most of it!
Some time back, I had taken a reading from someone who claims to be gifted, and connected with a higher power. You tend to run to these people when you’re going through a bad phase, and well, rarely are they truly ‘connected.’
Nevertheless, she told me 2017 is a very spiritual year for me. I didn’t give that much thought, because I wanted to ask her something else. But her words keep coming back to me. It really feels like something has awakened within me. Like a higher power decided to shake me up and tell me ‘Enough already! Stop depending on other people for what’s already within you!’
I lost my faith, only to have it returned in the strangest of ways. You spend your life looking for answers and then one day, it hits you. The answers have always been there.
Changes are happening. And they’re happening in every sphere of life. For once, I’m going with the flow and not getting overwhelmed. Let’s just say, I’m feeling unafraid. I say unafraid, and not fearless, as the latter is a very strong word, and it’ll take me a while to get there.
The coming weeks are crucial for me. I’m taking slow and mindful steps towards a happier life, all the while praying for strength.
It’s almost 1:30 am. I’m still sitting with a full face of makeup. I still need to clean my room and the mess I made on my dresser. But there was some urgent work and I had to switch on my laptop. So I decided to do a blog post as well.
Things are good. Much, much better than they were when I last posted. Is it my positive attitude which is responsible for me attracting a lot of new friends? I don’t know. But there really is something to this concept of positive thinking.
Ooh, I tried colored contacts tonight. I have to say, they were looking awesome and I was looking pretty. I love my natural eye color, but change can be fun!
There’s something I’ve been wanting to talk about for a long time. There is a lot of information on the internet. You’ll find numerous articles on any subject. Guys, please be mindful of what you’re reading. Not everything that’s on the net is correct. I see people propagating superstitions, advocating mind games. I don’t understand. I got a mail with the subject lines as ‘3 text messages to get him to chase you’. Seriously? Why would you do that? Ok, I’m saying the texts worked and he’s chasing you. What next? At some point, you’ll have to be yourself. Then what happens? Then you read something on how to keep the spark in the relationship. It’s just ridiculous.
Make yourself so complete that you don’t need to do all this. And come on, do you really want to think so much when you’re with your significant other?
My point is, start thinking, instead of just accepting anything you read. And don’t get lost in the sea of information. Keep your own thoughts alive. And if something feels wrong, don’t do it.
Good night dear readers. You’re wonderful as you are. Remember that.
The last week was a week of introspection for me. I did a lot of soul searching and read some self help books.
And what I finally realized was that my life is solely my responsibility. Nobody else owes me anything. It is up to me to make myself happy and complete myself. Throughout life, you will meet people who will bring you happiness or pain. But at the end of the day, they don’t owe you a thing- not even answers.
The only other people who genuinely feel responsible for you, are your parents. That too because their hearts are wired that way.
From what I’ve been reading, it seems like everyone realizes this at some point in life. And when you accept this fact, life gets a little uncomplicated. So the sooner, the better.
FYI, this is a fantastic realization, once you let it sink it. No one can take your happiness away from you. It is created by you. That gives you a lot of power!
I’m working on myself every single day. Being happy and positive is not a one day thing. It is something that takes practice and I intend to perfect it.
Often, I’ve wondered how some people can be okay with the fact that someone is crying because of them. Forget God and karma. I’m just saying, how do you let selfishness take over your conscience?
But then, that’s life. You think you know someone. You see only the good in them, till they decide to show you their other side.
However, life goes on. It does not stop for anyone or anything. Nor should you. Give yourself time to heal, but don’t look back. Don’t wait and don’t get your hopes up. I’ve always felt that closure comes once you kill all your hopes related to that person or situation.
Just be easy on yourself. You must never be unkind to yourself. Console yourself like you would console a loved one. Open up to someone who won’t judge you. It really helps. Or just write. Nothing is as therapeutic as writing. Just put it all on paper. Cry if you must, but don’t look back.
There’s nothing wrong in asking for help. You are important. You are loved and you’ll make it through this.
I have a lot of self esteem issues. It pains me to admit it, and it would just be easier to go through life pretending that I love myself and everything is great. But it won’t be wise. And it’s high time I face facts.
I truly believe that you have to admit there’s a problem, before you start working on it. So yes, there is a problem here. And I intend to work on it. Starting today. How do I intend to go about it? Well, it’s going to be through books and the internet and actual application of all the theories in real life. Also, there is this 21 day self love challenge that I’ll be looking into. I don’t know how it’ll end but I have to make a start. If you have any helpful pointers, please let me know.
Another issue is my negative thinking. Now that stems mainly from my family. No no, this is not a rebellious rant against my parents. I love them and they love me so very much. But they’re negative people. They believe the worst, talk a lott about the things that have caused them hurt, and never count their blessings. It pains me to see them going through life like this, but for now, I have to start with myself. How do I help someone else unless I’m sorted? It’s one of those things where you have to wear your own oxygen mask, before you go on to help another.
Now, I am going to do my best to inculcate positive thinking in every aspect of my life. It’s not a one day thing, and it is going to take time. Throwing out every belief and basically changing your nature and approach towards life! But I will do this. I must. I want a beautiful life, and this is the first step towards it.
Most of my readers come from twitter and I would request you to stop me immediately if you do see a negative tweet, or anything that you guys feel is going to hamper my journey.
Wish me luck and send me positive vibes!
There’s something very pleasant about the night. I’ve always been a night owl. The day has been dealt with, the makeup is off, the pajamas are on. This is the time when I light my scented candles, put netflix on and sip on my green tea.
Tonight, I’ve lit a candle which has a name, just as beautiful as its fragrance- Sea Breeze.
This is my favorite way to spend the last hours of the day. Obviously, I’m not a party person. The last thing I want to do is be in a dark, loud place, where I’ve to scream on top of my voice, just to speak to another person.
I’m watching ‘Serendipity’ tonight. It’s got a charm to it, this leaving things to fate concept. Not sure if I trust my luck enough though. Lately, I’ve started questioning a lot of things- the existence of God, fate, destiny…all of the things that I earlier accepted without a second thought.
I’ll leave it that for tonight. Will surely do a post sometime on changed beliefs.
Good night ❤
Well, here I am. It feels good to be back in a familiar space. Why did I stop writing in the first place? Maybe that’s why I was so lost. Writing has always been therapeutic for me. I think my thoughts get clarity only when I’ve penned them down.
It has been a strange couple of days. But, I’m looking forward to what life has in store for me. I’m feeling quite positive today. High on life. I’m getting attracted to bright colors, pictures and just generally finding beauty in everything. Now we know that’s not always going to be the case, but let me just enjoy it while it lasts.
I feel like getting dressed up, clicking my own pictures. What’s better than being your own muse? Celebrate yourself. Love yourself. See your own beauty, even if the world is blind to it.